♥ Drama Queen ♥

Friday, October 23, 2009

quizzing on the last day of hols

65 Questions You've Probably Never Been Asked...

1. First thing you wash in the shower?
my hands. duhh...

2. What colour is your favourite hoodie?
pink.its a very kebudakan one..hehehe.malu mau pakai, tht y u guys have never seen it!

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
yup. :)

4. Do you plan outfits?
yeah.but i normally don go w the plan.id go chg my mind.

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now?
sickly. i dont feel like talking.

6. Whats the closest thing to you that's red?
my top :) n i just realized.its my favourite

7. Tell me about the last dream you remember having?
i saw so many people.there was my 2nd cuzin faisal as a budak, eshie in her school prefect uniform.
but i cant remember it sgt la.

8. Did you meet anybody new today?

9. What are you craving right now?
pretzels~ those w the dips!

10. Do you floss?
yes. but not for a while. cos i lost my floss thingy,,...

11. What comes to mind when I say cabbage?
dyu u now any vegie o fruit tht starts w H or F? besides honeydew?

12. Are you emotional?
mowadays, rather. i noticed tht i have developed a teardrop mole near my right eye.

13. Have you ever counted to 1,000?
y shud i?

14. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it?

15. Do you like your hair?
notbad la.needs a trim.very long currently.

16. Do you like yourself?
i love myself w all my flawed self!!

17. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush?
ill pass.

18. What are you listening to right now?
coldplay's fix u!

19. Are your parents strict?
my dad's rather cool la.but my mom,the very opposite. huhuh!
not till i turned 9teen ;P

20. Would you go sky diving?
i am the yes woman!huahuahua!

21. Do you like cottage cheese?
depends la.cooked one la.not the raw one.eeeee....they stink!

22. Have you ever met a celebrity?
numerous of times! haha.
once i saw i cant remember hu on the way back frm london!
:P i think i still have her autograph!

23. Do you rent movies often?
yup. im a gud citizen. say NO to piracy!
+ piratec CDs rosak ur laptop u noe!

24. Is there anything sparkly in the room you're in?
my carkeys.

25. How many countries have you visited?
nta.too many. uk,us,thailand,australia, singapore,korea,europe(malas nk tulis), n most fav of all,mekkah! :)

26. Have you made a prank phone call?
hehehe.yeah.sorry eshie,my prime target! hehehe.

27. Ever been on a train?
yeah.when ah? tht day i came back frm uk when went to penang.hahaha.
tht was the last.ok, if lrt,
then f5. hehe..to go to school.

28. Brown or white eggs?
dono.i eat the whites.thts all i noe.

29. Do you have a cell phone?
hu doesnt?

30. Do you use chapstick?

31. Do you own a gun?
no thx.

32. Can you use chop sticks?
kinda la.

33. Who are you going to be with tonight?
my parents.duhh.

34. Are you too forgiving?
yeah i guess.

35. Ever been in love?
u mean ever felt my heart skip a beat or sink a mile? yeah.

37. Ever have cream puffs?
hu hasnt ppl? OMG!

38. Last time you cried?

39. What was the last question you asked?
whe r we eating?~~~typical of me! hehehe

40. Favorite time of the year?
when i get my scholarship.
ka-ching ppl!

41. Do you have any tattoos?
w those needles?
nah. im too hot for tht!

42. Are you sarcastic?
of course.w my old school frends.they take it the best. n of course my besties.
other ppl sumtimes jz don understd.

43. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect?
huh?i gues..

44. Have you ever walked into a wall?
yeah.this one time, i was really bz texting,

45. Favorite colour?
im lil misz colorful
splash me any color besides grey n id b fine!

46. Have you ever slapped someone?
no thnk u.

47. Is your hair curly?
im not sure.i think their more like wavy la.

48. What was the last CD you bought?
dt b ez.cassie.
bcos,in my whole life,
i have onli bought 2 cds!
hahaha.the rest were free!

49. Do looks matter?
depends.cant look hideous now can u?

50. Could you ever forgive a cheater?
maybe i wud. but there wud be this scare tht he/she wud never ever heel ever.
n things will never b the same again.

51. Is your phone bill sky high?
i think it is u noe.
but my parents dont noe bcos i like topup lil by little..heheh

52. Do you like your life right now?
theres no end to complaints.
so lets b content shall we?

53. Do you sleep with the TV on?
i cant sleep w the tv on.

55. Do you have good vision?
i hope so

56. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people?
i cant regard it as hate,
i think its more of a hate-love relationship.NOT hate tht i love.

57. How often do you talk on the phone?
i sumtimes hate fon calls.
i love to get calls.
but i hate pickin them up.

58. The last person you held hands with?
my mom yday night wen i was in ou

59. What are you wearing?
my new favourite red checkered top!

60. What is your favourite animal?
i actually lik dogs.

61. Where was your default picture taken?
in the surau in my mom's college.
i jz loved tht baju! it makes me feel so much lik a journalist!

62. Can you hula hoop?
maybe.never tried it.

63. Do you have a job?

64. What was the most recent thing you bought?
carrot n mango juice.

65. Have you ever crawled through a window?
*pauses n think*
generally,theres always a grill in all windows.
excep fr my place back in uk.
no grills there.

the girl that lies behind ur mirror

tht girl that lies behind ur mirror

"you're confused" mr Apricot said demurely, making his concluding point.

cinnamon looked up in a flash,
"i m not!"

but mr apricot had already had his say, and all in all proving his rightful self.

How could a girl with only one dream fall down and had her heart shatter into a million pieces let that sink deep in her?
falling down was just too simple. And at some point of life, everybody does. And so has cinnamon. But lifting her chin up and tucking in her tummy seems to be the hardest
and the most impossible thing in her life right now(or ever).

"it is my dreams....it is my goal..i will never let it slip tru my fingers," cinnamon reflected...
"if i dint get it, my children, my grandchildren and even my great grandchildren will now my despair.."

"i will die in despair" cinnamon quotes.

Mint, being her perfectionist self is never self contained either. Everything is too little or too much for her. "Too many guys too little time," Safron wud have put it.
Mint was off in New york,chasing her dreams in the big apple. While Safron was stuck with the guy next door who might never fall for her brains nor her looks.
orchid, being the tall, long legged blonde, can never be too obsessed with her looks that supposedly fall short behind others. Pearls on the other hand, being
the nearly perfect human being, yet, never scored any balls.

Flawed would be how cinnamon regarded everyone. well, except this one girl back in high school, who was, well, just perfect.forget abt tht missy.
Cinnamon hated flaws. She was a perfectionist herself like her best friend Tammy. Tammy was taller than Cinnamon, especially with the added advantage of her
always fabulous heels.

Everyone in Cinnamon's life was just there.
"Well. at least somewhere there" cinnamon murmurs."Where am I? the life i lead is no life to be considered in the ver beginning,"

Cinnamon lay her heavy head on the railings of steps behind her college. Students had already gone back home by then. She knew she was safe from any ears.
Strings of pearls flowed generously on her teardrop moled cheeks. HAving a laid back life isn't the best at times. Her life seemed to be falling to pieces as college fell into place.
IN all her years of living, had she finally came to he solution that keeping mum everyday would be the best option ever. Cinnamon had to make a decision.
She was no more that 9 year old who could run to her mummy and daddy seeking for solutions. She was in the big dog eat dog world now.

It was her last year of college. there was a crossroad right in front of cinnamon's nose. How lucky Safron, Mint, Orchid and Pearls are all pre-decided with their lives.
Well, either they have decided or they already have a safe landing. Something very contrary to Cinnamon.

As Cinnamon's grades fall drastically, her only dream seem to be crashing to the floor with a loud thud in front of her eyes. The very flash of that scene continues the steady stream of hot tears.
Nothing can be done. No one can help. Of course God could. but how can god help a person who doesnt help themselves?

Many say that when you fall down only 2 things can happen, either God helps you to get up or God can teach you fly.but at that particular time, Cinnamon felt as if there was no way to fly. there is only room to get up.
BUt she has fallen like this before. And as she tot she recovered, she realized, she hadnt. she is actually still licking the old wounds. and worst still, the bruises were bad.
falling down again feels as if the old wounds are worthless to be licked, as the time of heal, takes the expense of the other parts of her to be freshly cut.

Cinnamon loved her friends. But with kiasu friends, its quite tiring. The kiasu-ness of her friends hinders her from so many things. But cinnamon has to succumb to one or another.
Loneliness or hypocritical friendliness.

which will it be?

Since i turned 9teen

I'M RESIGNING, I'M HEREBY OFICIALLY TENDERING MY RESIGNATION AS A TEENAGER! I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an eight-year-old again!
I want to go down to McDonalds and think it’s a five-star restaurant. I want to think that M and M's are better than money because you can eat them.
I want to eat a whole packet of Oreos and ice-cream without feeling guilty afterwards. I want to return to when all you knew were colours, multiplication, tables and nursery rhymes.
I want to return to when you didn't know and you didn't care. I want to remember the whole morning was filled of what your Mom had packed for lunch and the whole afternoon what you were having for dinner. When a simple matchbox car or a Barbie doll represented a whole week's worth of entertainment. When you actually had an imagination.
When magic really existed. When 'Jaws' didn't look fake. I want to think the world is fair. That everyone is honest and good would always triumph over evil.
When a member of the opposite sex was just some annoying disturbance. When friends were real and you didn't care if they were black, white, Muslim , Catholic, Asian, African, fat, skinny, pink, green or from a whole other planet, it just didn't matter... until others told you differently! I want to believe that anything is possible all you have to do is Dream. I want it to be unknown to me the complexities of life and to be completely ecstatic by the little things again like the sound of the Mr. Paddle Pop! I DON'T want to know of school, homework, clothes, friendship, relationships, popularity or even gossip! I want to believe in the power of smiles, hugs, a kind word, truth, justice, peace, dreams and human kind. I want to believe that all adults must know everything (How wrong we were).
So here's my money, keycards, my makeup, and my adolescence.

I give u my 9teen, and I’ll gladly return to 9 years old at least.

it shattered to bits

Hatiku telah berkecai.

Selama kian lamanya,
matahari yang menyinari hidupku telah mekar dengan daunan hijau dan kuntuman bunga segar.
yang membara dari hari ke hari,

akan sekian lama,
daunan hijau telah layu menjadi kuning,
dan kuntuman segar menjadi kering.

lelehan air mata tiada pengubat untuk kejadiaan yang dianggap takdir,
tiada daya boleh menahan sebak di dada.

terlalu banyak telah kulalui.
terlalu banyak telah kuditimpa.
tidakku terdaya tahan lagi.

lepaskanlah ku.
biarlah aku jatuh ke tanah air.

lepaskanlah ku.
biarlah hatiku berderai dek seribu satu bahagian

kutidak ketentuan.
kumahu hentikannya.

tetapi hatiku berdarah,
darah yang parah.
kutidak tahan.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

last ramadhan 09

hu wants to be the next famous msian blogger?

As I was busy scouting the world wide web for topics for me to write on for my future u-phoria articles, I googled: Malaysian Blogs
well something like that la...
So I stumbled upon this one blogger who supposedly had the tips to become a FAMOUS malaysian blogger. It was interesting, so i read on. It was short. and best of all, simple,~~although his english had alot of errors. haisz. Here are the 'supposedly' tips...(I have editted it for safety reasons)

ONE.(1) Criticise This is meant to be the very first rule to become a famous blogger, and to b more specific, u have to condemn people. Personally, this first rule is very controversial and has alot of politics to do with it. Oh gosh, never will i condemn anyone on the web! Unless i have lost my nuts. Not icons, nor my friends. gheesh.

Advertise. U r expected to have at least ONE ad on ur blog. even if you dont have enuf visitors on ur blog.gheesh.so sian la wei. and yeah, this fella advices that you do not have too many,because it would only annoy ur visitors. the purpose u have an ad u ask? it is to show that u are interested to become a pro-blogger *thinking face* do i wana b a pro-blogger??? hmmm......ill pass.

THREE.(3) RE-POST. This means, u have to copy paste from another place. Right. Come on. Be original people. This guy brings up the fact that the small number of internet users in this country. hence, we should just visit some famous bloggers' blog and just paste it in ours. Gheesh. do we have to do that? have a life people!

FOUR.(4) local Celebrities. Due to the fact that our country is sucha small densed population, it is so-called advisable that you DO NOT condemn any local artists. As our country generally have only 2 categories of people. 1.people hu are avid fans of this celebrities 2.people hu cant care-less abt these celebrities. I most definitely fall into the 2nd category. i only bother about the most famous, like, Siti nurhaliza, Mawi and so on so forth.

Be friendly. Something i definitely am. hehehe.... well, this referes to the visitors that visit ur blogs and actually comment on it. u r adviced to listen to these people and reply back politely. well, no one comments on my page. so no need to be friendly la.. hahaha

Fake it. Simple, I actually thought of this sometime back. lolsz. Here, you are supposed to have those visitor counts. you know,the ones that go "your page has been visited by this many people" ok, then, u r to log into ur own pg numerous times. my tot:pathetic i mean, ntn rong u ceking out ur pg...but jz to increase the number of visits by URself? saddening la u... wait, theres more. ur also asked to comment on ur page with a variety of names (as different ppls la konon) the purpose? to show that u have a line of fans. right.

lAst, but not least. a tip i dont exactly mind at all. Join a community. u noe, any malaysian community whe u can register ur blog on. then i believe all those ppl frm the community wud b cekin out ur blog. anyhow, personally, i think wht makes a blog cunterfyin is, PICTURES! hehehe... as they say, a picture speaks a thousand words. and thts exctly y felt so frustrated wen i lost my cybershot. n m stil currently missing it badly. i love u old phony.

i shot spongebob bcos im f*ckin awesome

im freaking bored on this 15th of oct.
and im legal to do wtv i wana.

Pick The Month You Were Born In:
1 (jan) - i danced with

2 (Feb) - i needed

3 (Mar) - i killed

4 (Apr) - i got drunk with

5 (May) - i slapped

6 (June) - i yelled at
7 (July) - i slept with

8 (Aug) - i jumped with

9 (Sept) - i ran naked with

10 (Oct) - i shot

11 (Nov) - i kissed

12) (Dec) - i fucked

Pick the day (number) you were born on:
1 - a hobo

2 - the cool aid man
3 - a porn star

4 - a crackhead
5 - the one i love
6 - willy wonka
7 - a monkey
8 - a teletubby
9 - a condom
10 - Yo Momma

11 - my "boo"

12 - a ninja
3 - paris hilton

14 - a sexy boy

15 - a stripper

16 - a slut
17 - a snowman

18 - Spongebob

19 - my crush

20 - a toilet
21 - the cookie monster
22 - my ex.
23 - my right hand bitch

24 - a gangsta

25 - a homeless guy
26 - a pervert
27 - barney (the dinosaur)

28 - the jonas brothers
29 - a bed

30 - my pool
31- my underware

Pick the color of shirt you are wearing:
White - because im cool
Black - because i love sex

Pink - because im a skank

urquoise-because i like to skinny dip

Brown- because i love hate
Polka Dots - because Im CRAZY
Purple - because I'm gay

Grey - because that bitch stole my hamburger

Other - because I'm ghetto

Green - because i have AMAZING boobs

Orange - because i am a mental retard

Red- because Im in a gang

Blue - because im fucking awesome
Tye dye- because Im a groovey scuba diver Graphic- because gummy bears rape me
Yellow- because i am a weird-o
None- because i have hot abs

my cries will vanquish the fire

it was the 14th of oct 2009.
4 days till my last.

I was sleep deprived, altho i slept around 12 the night b4,but there was a sleep debt from the nite before...
so i was having a deep (but seriously n UNcomfortable) sleep in the surau...

mother: ....ya! there's going to be a fire drill this morning!
me: ha???
mother: go down to the library (tryin to save me la nier~~)
me: im sleepy la....
mother: turun tau, bawak laptop, they said you cant bring bags
me: ma...u can la! as long as u are not going to need a golly time to pack up

so, listening to my mom,
i dressed up, and went to wash up and made my way down to the library using the lift (thank god!)

i took out my darling baby lappie from my bag, and read newspapers in the library waiting for the alarm to go on.
All the librarians had all envisioned he drill too,
so they all were hurdling up in their main office.
Some lecturers were already down from offices..
~~~some in the library with me,reading papers,
~~~some looking for cover (so not they are not so obvious) in faculties located downstairs
~~~some anticipating it at the reception area

I quickly put back the papers, put my baby lappie back into my bag...
and received a msg
mother: wait in front of the library

and as i walked out, there she was.

Seriously of all days they want to have a firedrill,
its ALWAYS..
i seriously mean ALWAYS,
Every year they want to have a firedrill in my mom's college,
firstly,I'd be around...
secondly,and WORST still,

i mean, dont get me rong,i love heels,
albeit, it is my holidays, and i have been so accustomed to wearing my flat slippers...
and i had only started wearing heels back again a day before.
considering that i have abandoned heels all tru semeter I 09/10 ~~~points to nabilah!!hihihihi....

there was some water show by the bomba people.
I was too busy sitting on this tembok in between these guys~~~who were socially smokin in to my face
thnk god im so used to smoke/cigarattes, so wtv la...
but this one guy wore a snowcap and seriously reminded me of snow cap guy...

i think there was also some mock life saving done.
they did that last yr,
they took this one office guy and asked him to lie on strecher and they were carryin him around the open area.
hahaha....very funny.
i still remember, tht office guy actually pulled the scene off really well.
cos i (n like most of the others) tot he was knocked unconcious
especially wen they had some explosions going on the roof top of some of the buildings w smoke and all.
i tot is it was coolio la gak.
this yr also got explosion. can smell it.
bt didnt c neting la tho....

all was done,
snow cap clone: dah abes dah kak,*looking straight at me*
me: *just smiled*
my innerself:omg! did he call me KAK????? i shud have worn jeans!

NOTE to self: next time ALWAYS wear sempoi!!!!!

i wasnt even dressed up if u ask me,
but i was wearing my high school prefect skirt and a manjalara la tho...

bt at least i did get to c this kinda hot guy la...
he's supposedly NOT my type~~u noe, with the leather jacket n all....
i normally go for the good shirt guys....u noe, the angelic ones,....hahaha....
anehow, i keep bumping into him...everywhe...
even after the fire drill when i headed to the library, there he was.
very funny.

nursing students walking back to the main building

more people walking...

the orange bomba guys

they had some water 'show'
i didnt get up to c.
too lazy
my baby was too heavy n didnt want to risk it frm masuk-in the longkang.

the day she turned 9teen


A Thursday that I remember vividly must be the day nabilah turned 19. My first class of the day was at 10, giving me about 2 hours to study for my due quiz of biology at 4 in the evening. Computer that day wasn't all that bad actually, well despite, if im not mistaken, we had to pass up our calc assignment.
thankfully, there wasnt a quiz. wait, was there a quiz? nope. but we had physics lab exactly after computer. which was also not that bad. Well, what can i say, I love our lecturer, madam Halizawati :) I think I have always been granted with the BEST physics teachers! Seriously! ever since schooling days with Puan Salina! (Love you cikgu!)

Anyhow, after lab, we went our separate ways, and I went to marjani's room. the intial plan was that she followed me to Jaya one and get a cake for Nabilah. But the Mahallah office didn't give her the approval. So, instead, I had to walk out on my own. unfortunately, I broke my heel earlier that day! when i was with mimi for lunch.anyhow, the weather that day turned bad later on that day. As i walked out of the gate, i saw grey skies descending upon me. So I decided to face this ordeal ASAP. but hw fast can a broken heeled girl walk anyways? How did i 'break' my heel of my favourite court shoe that i had bought on sale with my bestie, eka? Well, my heel got stuck in between the slabs of the walkway from Annex to KC...and i kinda gave it a good nudge. And even before that, the heel was already faulty. so yeah, a budge really pulled it off. i have yet to send for mending.

Back to thursday, seriously, my broken heel wasnt the biggest challenge for me. Because first off, I was to find Cold Storage, which I had no idea where of, since I had never been there. But not to worry, I found it in the end. but there werent any cakes there. So i had to scout for other shops. And unfortunately, there were only 2 other cake shops. firstly, the one next to guardian, and the other was the famous secret recipe. thankfully after numerous texts, messaging and deliberation, we settled for the cake from the cake shop next to guardian damn. it waas nice. chocolate cheese. a medium sized one, enuf to feed all (intially) 7 of us...

ihad 2 slices...because i was really
i mean, after making it tru t rain... walking all along UKC (since i needed shelter from the rain)

THANK god i didnt bump into anyone from UKC!!!
i mean, HELLO! malu tau! summore i was soaking wet n stinkin w the rain scent... it must have been acid rain la wei! gheesh. I reached safely to mimi's rum and had only abt 30 mins to spare to read up biotech b4 class.

me:*still in mimi's rum* I M SO LATE...

anis: chillex la...

me: eh, whe's madam?

everyone: *nose in books*


me: seriously, do we even have a quiz?

evryone: *stares at me blankly*

me: ~whispers to myself~ omg, we are goin to run BEHIND schedule!!!
madam: sorry class, i had another class before this *quickly passin ard the quiz papers~~~wic were,
mind you, ALOT!*
me: mimi, we'l b runnin behind schedule
mimi: hw long?
me: no clue. mdm's still xhere!

mimi: ok txt me wen ur ready


mimi: whe are you?
me: tgh quiz ni...baru start!!

mimi: are u guys done?
me: we have to mark our quizzes!
mimi: kite org dah pasng lilin dah ni
me:omg,i takowt the cake melt!! it shud be in the fridge!


we were still in class. nabilah was persistent that she wanted to pass up her tutorial that day itself!
mind u, we were THE ONLY ones left in class,
EVERYONE had gone back home.
only god noes how much i tried to persuade her to finish it up later! gheesh.

<----me tryin to persuade her to go makan w me!!! *nobody by wonder girls ring*
mimi:do you now wat time it is?

me:I knoe! but she wont budge!

just before that,

me: nabilah, anta je la esok
nabilah:bt i wana send it today
me: come on...
nabilah: sikit je la lagi
me: kiter lapar la
nabilah: *continues doin her tutotrial*

me: lepas ni teman kan kiter gi tgk makan ye?

in reality: i WAS HUNGRY pown!! starving!!! nabilah: ok (p*ssd off w me pestering her)


me: MIMI! cepat pasang lilin!!! we're on the way



we were in Ucafe,

and nabilah had saw all her ruumates gathered...

nabilah: eh,

me: jom tgk makanan...*pullin nabilah away*

nabilah: ape tu? *pushing my hands off her*

me: ntn, jom nabilah? i belanja...

before long,.

she saw them,

with the cake,

and the unlited cndles...

me: SUrprise...

nabilah: *hands to her mouth*

me: u lambat sgt...

finally, she got her speech back...

from then on,
evrything was history.


that was The Thursday of semester I 09/10.

the 12th of August 2009.
the day my study partner turned 9teen with her loved ones.

boy she can bite... :P

with the ever cute ruumates~~~
ps-ruumates were in blue
pps-gedik besties in pink~~~

the comel,
we dint forget ur bday.

As if you dont

About 2 weeks till the end of semester,
somwhe ard b4 puasa.
i was stricken w a bad flu/fever.
i was absent from class for abt 1 week.
i felt as if all was hell at that time.i hated skippin classes and getting left behind.
i was in a mess when i came back.

life was in sucha a hectic stream from then.
and my finals were around the corner. with raya.

Only god knew how i felt.
i looked fine, at most neways, but come on.
i was piled with a thousand kinds of pressure.
with my miszed quizzes, tutorials, assignments and articles.
and worst of, some i didnt even noe of bcos it jz 'slipped' frm their minds to tell me.

i was in a wreck.
my exams were due on the first week of raya.
and raya was.
even more hectic.
my family n i decided to paint to paint my living room this yr.
and guess when we started paintin?
on the last day of puasa.
although we started early,
it was never completed.
(well now it is la)
my mom n i didnt even get to go to my most favourtie-est place for raya...
PKNS shah alam tht is!
so :(
hence, i didnt get my xtra baju raya (since i normally buy a couple pairs of baju
raya frm pkns jz for sakes~~~hehehe...)

raya was terrible.
i didn even get my raya kurung ready,....
the tailor called me 2 days b4 raya crying.
wat was i to do? her machine rosak-ed.

thankfully, i had some baju for my new semester,
i wore those instead.

enuf said.

my exams finally ended on the 3rd of oct.
it was crazy.
i think i seriously got a phd out of it.
u du noe wats phd right?

bcos seriously,
i cudn exctly f(x) tht well for days.
and for tht matter in fact,
maybe weeks.

i wasnt my usual self due to all those happend above.
of course,when i was in campus in front of my frends,
i lukd fine,
healthy as a suria.
gigling lik a suria.
smiling lik a suria.
talkative lik a suria.

but wat do they knoe whts inside me?
but wht do they knoe wht my emotional and unhidden me is goin tru?

nothing at all.
never will they knoe.
even when this blog is being published.


Sometimes you have to smile...
Pretend everything's okay.
Hold back the tears,
And just walk away

duing this period not far back,
i decided tht i needed to recuperate.
i wasnt myself.
and to get bak to myself,
i needed a time out.

of course,i dint say it to the whole world.not to my frends, well, not directly.

Sometimes you just can’t open up to someone.
Not because you don’t trust them.
But because once you tell someone how you feel inside, you’re giving them permission to hurt you…

but i implied it.
i surely did,
i dint take calls.
i dint reply texts. (unless they were important)
i dint social network.
i dint keep in touch.
i dint alot of things la.

during tht whole course,

just because i dint pick fons up.
just because i dint listen to them
just because i didnt ym them back.
just because i didnt help them.
just because i dint get back to them.

people regarded me as, well, let me c, selfish?

how cud they.

it broke my heart.
and well, most of all,
fired me up.

so i kept my distance from a mile to a light year.
i dint wan things to get frm bad to worst.

come on.
did they pick up all my calls?
did they reply my yms?
did they keep in touch?
did they get back to me?

if u were to look in the mirror,
then u'd understand.

as if u dont.

most of all,
things will never be the same again,

as this is the suria afifah of
the tarnished and broken hearted.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Photo Bloggin Mojo

Let me share with you the launch of Nst's U-phoria....

God noes how many shots were taken to get this one...
my brand new phone!!!
2 day old!!

while waiting for the threesome picture with john n tarsha!

my short intro to myself...

feel the u-phoria~~~

the Korean speakin lecturer from main cam IIU
lecturing engineering!
tyra! popo! its ur future lecturer!!!~~hehehe

Seriously...this is how i feel when i get damn hiatus! huaaaa~~~

Size 16 saves the world

As i had my first week of semester break, i spent my days with my laptop watching movies back to back with the constant thought that I had articles to write. So I scouted for ideas. Surfing the internet. Reading blogs, Google-ing words and texting my friends for ideas and opinions. Even my mom helped me, she talked up to her colleagues to for ideas for stories. She felt my stress. Evidently, as she could see the frown I had on my face, and the constant ranting I had been going on towards her. Poor mummy... Im sorry.. I just have so much of pressure for these past few weeks. Not feeling very myself. As I scrolled down My Documents window of my vista, I saw the movie Confessions of Shopaholic, waiting for me to watch it. Bear in mind, I haven't watched movies for a long time now. My last movie being The Proposal. That wasn't that long was it? Well, the movie before that was James Bond's Quantum Of Solace if I'm not mistaken. So just imagine how crappy I am with the movie scene. I didn't get the chance to watch the most anticipated movie of the year (that I was actually excited about) Harry Potter! OMG right? Even Eshie watched it twice! HUHU! Anyways, back to Confessions of a Shopaholic, I have to admit, I was once a shopaholic too. Well, actually maybe I still am. Although so, due to my oversized self of mine, my shopping in this country is hindered, With dresses ranging from sizes 2 to 10, it is impossible for me to fit into clothes sold at these shops. So it's not my wallet that's a problem, but it’s my bucket that is. Funny isn't it? How people regard fat as bad, but not do they see the better side of it. With my urge for shopping and dressing (not to mention) being a plus size girl is a benefit. How I learn to curb my endless whims and fancies just by the fact that I can't fit into those so-called 'fabulous' dresses. Anyways, what's good on some may not to others? And surely, I am happy, and most of all grateful for who I am. It's not what in the mirror that speaks, but it’s the mind and soul that wins the league.

reflect it once

From an aspiring doctor’s point of view, the field of medicine is a noble field if it brought with dignity and integrity.

A while back, I read about people discriminating addicts and those who help them i.e. doctors, is an appalling story.
In this era of modernisation, some may probe that the occupation of doctors as a tedious and an unnecessary – or at least, not the most required – especially with the bloom of pharmacists, nutritionists and therapists. Only that they fail to realize that doctors are the ones who puts these people together like a jigsaw puzzle. How heavy the burden is, and how people cease to notice this. I may not have any experience whatsoever in this field, neither am I in this heritage of doctors, but I could sense it. Surely out there, there are those general practitioners or doctors that seem to over charge patients that walk through their doors. Without doubt, those are those who are not as merciful as the others who don’t. Indeed, these doctors need to make a living, but what is a living if it is by cutting others by their throats. Do they not see those doctors like Dato’ Jemilah mahmood who serve the nation with an open heart. For they must not see the reward God will one day bestow upon them.

Brains may be the prerequisite to get into medical school, but what about those who have deep passion for this noble deed? Should they be deprived?

Whe's Suria gone to?

Ola from the 2nd week of semester break!
I am somewht in the middle of my holidays~~~it was meant to be a long one (3weeks) but so much for being long la~~~~i feel like its endin~~~huaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

its 5 days till my last~~

and at the moment, u can c my lack of writing out blogin to the world,
though i have endless connection to the world wide web! Well, stop rite there! because i have been blocked from any
social networking services~~yup u heard me right, ym, msn msgr, FB, FS, MS....
huhuhuaaaaaaaaaaaa......n most loved of all...alilbitofevrything.blogspot!!!!
well,i can read it....but its not edit-able!!

if u do wanna 'check-up' on me~~
u can always read my articles in U-phoria!!
at this addressz~~

check it out!
its still new! and its our baby...
and i m part of it! As i am a MOJO....
whats a mojo u ask?
it stands for Mobile journalist...