♥ Drama Queen ♥

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

its tht time of the month.



husnul zohn seems to be so much easier said thn done! n thts wen u noe,
ur astagfirullahs just isnt enuf.
ur selawats need to be increased!
ur doas need to be strengthened!

bcos ur strength seem to be slipping away and awayyyyy.


i finally confessed to a dear sahabah my inner fears.
fears tht i have only ngadu to Allah.
that I have longed for moral support for sucha long time.

my sahabah had started the spark of moral support.
the moral support i had been looking for.

just the spark to leraikan parasite-parasite dalam jiwa raga ini.
dalam hati yang luluh dek di makan perasaan.
jasad yang lemah dek di makan semangat yang semakin pudar.

i think im finally here.
the last leg of my race. marathon. my challange.
this is the naggin feeling i had been having.
the nakalness knew it had to move aside for this.
the bad knew it couldnt face this.
the good was being brewed.
the awesome is yet to come. #insyaAllah


maryam : 4
oh lord, don make me give up
im finally here.
the worst has been resolved.
the major has been over ruled.
subhanallah alhamdulillah :))

now. only the god-complex that seem to present itself besides Allah.
how did Moses do it with his father?
how did Rasulullah did it with his people?
how did Maryam face her clan?
how did Asiah face her husband?

what am i compared to all those great people?
what is my measly problem compared to theirs?
their burning.
their kepulauan.
their tears.
their pain.

nothing i m.

never will Allah burden us more than we can.

if u believe in justice, u will believe in the heareafter -nouman ali-


oh Allah permudahkanlah

how did they face these 'godly' complexes in their time?
how did they face the shadows of their time?
how did they gain the rewards of the hereafter using this dunya as their tools?


Allahumma salli `ala muhammadin wa`ala ali muhammad

i hear my mother's voice in the background of my head.
her wise words of a mother.
"kena doa ya. doa. itulah senjata kita. continuous doa, just as the prophet seeked Allah's protection and doa-ed at all times"


birds of a feather flock together.
how do u they do it?
what if they are the same species,
but dyed (not died) differently?
what if one of them was different?
does tht lil fellow have to follow the flock?

migrate he might need,
herd he might need.
but heard he is not.
need he is not.

but where does the strength of the ummah lie if it;s not in its unity?
where does the doa of muslimin and muslimat go if the hearts of the ummah arent singly objective towards the betterment of the whole not the individual?


i was watching ustaz kazim on halaqah the other day,
and he said (paraphrasing)
the problem with our doa towards palestine, is that we only solat hajat and doa rigorously when there are major attacks. never continous. and when we doa. there is no unity the other side to perceive and receive our doas. the disunity of muslim ummah hardens the process of victory.


like the malays used to say,
bulat air kerana pembetung.
for if there wasnt a pembetung, the water wud just simply spill away separately..goin to waste.
i believe it is the same with our ummah and its doa. :(


then where does 'birds of a feather flock together' stand?
the feather then has got to be islam.


keep trying

i guess  have gota keep tryin.
keep tryin to fit in.

but what if the baju is just not my size?
what if i belong somewhere else?
not in jusco? but in ms read?
how will i noe?

why do we have to go to jusco?
cant we stand alone and make our own brand?
what if we had our own brand already anyways?

but even Rasullulah had his bestfriend. he had his beloved wife.
he had his abu bakr ;"(


yasmen mogahed once said,
don develop attachments in this world.
attach urself to allah.

but will people understand?
hav i understood?
did i understand it correctly?

and i thought october was my month.
my birthday.
i guess the day i turn 23 will be quite a day.

seeking strength from the Almighty Allah for this new leg of life. this new bump.


- Doa supaya tidak berputus asa [Maryam:4]
- Doa dilapangkan dada dan dipermudahkan urusan [Thaha:25-26]
- Doa mohon kurnia rahmat dan petunjuk yang lurus segala urusan [Kahfi:10]
- Doa mohon keampunan atas kesalahan meminta sesuatu yang tidak diketahui hakikatnya [Hud:47]
- Doa mohon diberi keputusan yang baik [A’raaf:89]
- Doa mohon kasih sayang untuk ibu bapa [Isra’:14]
- Doa mohon dihindarkan dari fitnah dan diselamatkan dari tipu daya orang kafir [Yunus:85-86]
- Doa memohon kesejahteraan dunia dan akhirat [Baqarah:201]
- Doa memohon keampunan dan rahmat [A’raaf:23]
- Doa memohon agar diterima amalan [Baqarah:127]
- Doa dicukupkan keperluan [Taubah:129]
- Doa mohon agar mensyukuri nikmat Allah [Ahqaf:15]

Allahumma salli `ala muhammadin wa`ala ali muhammad

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

only Allah

What horizons bring to us,
Only Allah knows,

What heart pieces that fell,
Only Allah heals.

What distance we go,
Only Allah decides its length.

Selamat malam petaling jaya.

nukilan suria.

Monday, August 26, 2013

lets get closer!

something i found on the internet.
no.7 intrigues me.
and ttly agree to no.14!

no. 23. as well.

24 ways to get closer to Allah

nikmat: a friendship

my favourite ayat from the Quran.

an aunt of mine once told me the secret to why her daughter is being liked by all.
the secret?
Ar Rahman
the Most Merciful

Yang Pengasih.

ever since then,
it has turned into my favourite ayat :))


My raya has finally come to a complete as i celebrated it at my last open house last weekend.
especially more when i had hosted my annual "open house" the weekend before last.
this years "open house" was supposedly smaller.
more quality than quantity as i had hand picked and chose hu i invited.
if u asked me,
id invite even more.
but my humble house can only fit so many anyways.

but at the end of the day,
in the words of eka
"i asked her (refering to me), how many people r coming? and she said,'sikit je! dlm 8 orang je!' and look how many people came!"
teasing me to Sam and Shalanee.


Eka and Sam and Kat, the most faithful Assuntarians hu always come yearly :')
As Huda's all the way in Johor and Lakshmy had her electives in Kelantan, and obviously my VERY faithful assuntarian, Eshrina, is all the way in Notts.

so anyways,
jazakillah khairan jaza
for those hu came and sanggup datang ke rumah ku :))
May Allah bless you with rahmat and rezeki

especially to my old CFSIIUM friends,
anis, amal and yana.
u guys do not noe how much i appreciate u guys coming.
I asked Allah for angels to guard me and surround me with sahabahs, Allah invited u guys to my home.
may Allah guard u guys and ur families with malaikats too :)


as my cousin said, "good la to those hu came, it shows how much u r being loved, as they took their time to come and spend time with u"

i nearly teared wen she said tht.


and this year was special on many levels.

<3 div="" nbsp="">
it was gona b eka's last raya at my place
(bcos shes flying off to sotong kering -southampton-)
<3 div="">
bi nabilah was interning in kl so she cud come!

but above all,
<3 div="">
it was a reunion/gathering FOR ALL my besties.
the most important people tht had been in my life.
friendship life la :))

the sisters tht i chose, and.
guess wht?
they chose me too.

<3 div="">
hu now lives a 20 min drive from my place came too :))

<3 div="">
a time of pathcing up.

but i cudnt cry.

noeing me.

evryone else: drama!
everyone: urghhh
me: sheesh! fine!

my 2000th instagram picture.
me and my besties.
tyra, mimi,bi,me,eka
ps-sorry for my grinny face.

the cake was for nabilah's birthday
(which she tot the mi and fi forgot =.=")
and eka's farewell
annnnddddd.. bcos cik kak mimi was mengidam-ing tht cake for eons ;)

u noe the thing about my friendship?
these people in the above picture are not my gang.
they are not my groupies.
not my angus thongs and perfect snogging.
they are my individually wrapped cheese singles.

they stand perfect by themselves.
enjoyed best alone.
(kinda sounds rong on many levels---but seriously, wat r u guys thinking about?!?! bahahaha)

but seeing them all come together at once,
i cant thank Allah enuf to surround me with such beautiful women, strong empowering.
a nikmat.


when my Assuntarian classmate came,
me: Everyone, this is Shalanee from Assunta,
me: Shal, this is, nabilah, my foundation bestfriend, mimi my uni bestie, tyra my roomie bestie, and tht at the end *refering to eka* errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

then we laughed out loud.

and sam replied, 
"su ni, ur supposed to have ONE best friend, she go have so many"

me: err. 


im the only child.
and it gets really lonely.
and they are all so similar yet so different to me.

and wen i befriended them,
it had always been an individual entity.

i m kindof the social awkward in a gang of many.
no. i don get mute.
nor do i not noe how to relate to people.
how do i put this?
if ur given the opportunity to be comfortable.
i take comfort in quality than quantity.
i honestly just feel awkward, whether or not i is seen

i guess thts y women rnt given the authority to marry more than 1.

im just wondering how im gona have kids.
not more than the amount of bestfriends kot.

*banyak pula my songehness*

hand in hand with tyra
aidil fitri 2013 at her place
the one hu persevered to teach me "husnul zohn"
relentlessly reminding me to husnul zohn always always and always!
thank u tyra, i shall pass down the husnul zohn (bersangka baek) to others!

example of friendship till anakcucu (cicit)
my moms besties cucu and me
their friendship 52 yrs and counting.
amira drew me a picture of me
and firdaus coloured in batman

to end this beautiful piece filled my beautiful sahabat

a tanyalah ustazah episode.
alil long it is.
but its title so amazing.
"wanita dambaan syurga"
semoga my family and girlfriends tergolong di dalam golongan ini



tanyalah ustazah: nikmat yang terpedaya

ALhibbu walkurhullah.
love and hate is from Allah swt.



Al An'am 44-45

Sesungguhnya friendship is also a nikmat.

i have been youtube-in these few days. since i have all the time in the world before my fourth yr starts.
and i stumbled upon this "tanyalah ustazah" episode about nikmat.

i teared.

i reflect back my life,
and i noe,
there are many istidroj tht has happened.
nikmat id disguise of bala.
wen u appear further and further away from Allah.
but He still grants u the wellbeing, He gives u comfort and Allows you to enjoy.
Sesungguhnya tht "enjoyment" is just a flame tht eats u up. Cume, at that time, u only feel its blue flames tht appear cool but never burns u completely.

astagfirullah hilazim.

In the western and dog-eat-dog world, it would seemrather foolish for one to feel that a person feels the fear of losing.
the fear of losing of something u own/have/worked for is negative quoted by the realistic.
and to a certain extent.
its true.

so wen u face this circumtance of "fear of losing"
be aware tht Islam actually covers this aspect as well!

a person goin thru the dear of losing cud b one hu is tamak or a person hu just isnt satisfied with their life.
a person hu wants even more than what they have.
this category falls into those hu are deprived from the nikmat of syukur.

eg. the aunt hu complaints, "kau ni bukan aku bagi satu hape pon! kau igt aku ni kaya sangat ke?"
walhal, alhamdulillah memiliki tanah dan harta.
sbg anakbuah.
kita hanyalah perlu diam dan berdoa utk mereka. Doa mereka utk mendapat hidayah and rasa cukup.

betul juga sahabat ku berkata,
"suria, memang benar kita ingin kaya untuk ummah supaya satu hari kita boleh berbelanja untuk ummah, akan tetapi what it we never feel enough? what if the fear of losing overwhelms us that we wudnt wanto part with out money fearing tht it just wudnt be enough?"

hence, we shud curb tht by training ourselve to give whatever small we have.
some spare change.
that 5cents in my pocket.
or the last 2 dollars u have in ur pocket

the one hu noes, all tht is given is just a 'loan' from Allah.
one hu noes tht All around them is Allah's
from the skies so blue with white clouds,
to the water that flows from their pipes
to the fingers that tap on their smartphone touchscreens.


these people hu terdetik di hati,
things that i have today,
the friends that are around me,
the car that i drive,
the mom that i have,
All are Allah's loaned to me,
one day to be taken away,
so now,
we syukur.

but the ustazah said,
it is followed by istighfar.
fir just incase,
the alhamdulillah we mention just isnt enuf.


so to all tht are free,
just click on the above link
or the one im refering

lets start our monday with a lil majlis ilmu.
well i hope watching youtube's majlis ilmu is considered.

bcos i kinda not noe how to get to noe where all these majlis ilmu are at.


DISCLAIMER: all examples are based on true life events for the reflection of our selves and he betterment of our own selves in the future. #insyaAllah

minta maaf atas kehilafan ku.
this is just a small coretan on a cloudy monday morning.


Friday, August 23, 2013

Mengapa Maseh Sorry? =.="

salam jumaat!

yet another rainy morning!
lets make doa!
as the prophet muhammad s.a.w. :))

as i was goin thru the short muslim stories on Youtube, i came across this one below.

i even linked it up on facebook.
it was short and maybe to some, redundant.
i mean, whats with the continuous apologies?

but then again,
wen we look back,
we are in the month of syawal.
a month we had celebrated eidul fitri.
eidul fitri, a time we go back to our fitrah, aka back to our pure states. and we can only attain them by cleansing our hearts.
our hearts that is the bekas (place) tht iman has to set in.
and insyaAllah after a whole month of purfiyin with ramadhan, may Allah accept our doas and ibadah :) 
insyaAllah :))

its now to clean it with some external 'detergents' aka our apologies with others.
our family.
those we continuously live with.
we continuously keep (or not keep) in touch with.

this perumpamaan is like,
we have a house,
imagine it dirty.
if its not those who stay inside it hu doesnt wana clean it,
never will it clean.

but alhamdulillah,
if the residents have started cleaning,
we need others to help clean it too.
exmple cleaners and certain other help.

so the same here.
ramadhan was the lil push.
and now,
we need the help of others to clean it too

but ofcourse,
sometimes we come to certain dead ends,
and we feel lik the end of the world.

fear not,
isnt Allah around?
isnt Allah the Most Merciful
Doesnt He noe our niat?
Doesnt He noe our intention to become better, and ultimately becoming closer to Him?
humans are weak.
people are weak.
because we are all the makhluk ciptaan (creations) of Allah.
we have no power except the power vested by Allah swt :")

as a dear sahabah of mine reminded, at the end of the day,
it is Allah tht redha with us or not.


sometimes i feel so sad.
missing the Islamic environment,
fear that I lead astray.

but Allah is the Most Merciful Most Graceful.
He lent me dear sahabah to remind me of Him.

so lets all,
lets this make our new doa,

"Oh Allah, The lords of Worlds, surround me with those whom you love who loves u too, of those soleh and solehah, to bring me back to You Always, and dont lead me astray"

bcos the worst type of astray is the one away from Your Lord.
for He noes best and wats Best for  u :))

#SORRY | MUSLIM SHORT FILM | HD |  ترجمة آسف للشيخ العودة بالانجليزية

so thats whats left of my raya,
"maaf zahir batin"

and to rapatkan silaturrahim.

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

that midpoint

lahawlawala quwatabillah hilaliyilazim!

no strength do i have without the strength bestowed on me from Allah!!
no love do I deserve if Allah did not love me.

but who am i?
just a servant,
that wen i ask my Master,
he answers,
and when i forget,
He provides.



"i'll never be that girl again, my heart is growing strong," -fifth harmony-
if it was maybe a few months ago, i mite have teared up to tht song,
but now,
its all over, #alhamdulillah :))

its lik all thts really left is Allah and His strentgh and love that burns my fuel.
its like daily He awakens me from sleep,
its my awakening.

i have my dips,
sometimes chocolate, dark and sweet to the nafs,
sometimes asam jawa lik, sour and acidic to life
and other times, like honey, just a tinge of disaccharide sweetness and healing to my soul.

so now,
after my newly found awakening,
im tryin to find tht midpoint tht can keep me cycling on my bike.
my bike of imaan.

after all,
"i regret my past, not for anyone, but for me, but i cant turn it back" -change of heart, muslim short film-
as it was all part of qado n qadar tht im learning.
after betateh-in, still learning.

where is the midpoint of imaan?
where is the midpoint of alim?
where is the midpoint of right?

there isnt one is there?

u either be in or out.
but here i am,
im still finding tht midline,midpoint,
bcos im still struggling,
i don wana b out,
and i totally wana b in, but sumetimes i just dont feel lik i can?

i noe,
the latter statement seems so redundant!
i have even been recently reminded by a dear one that,
"its not lik she cant fit in, she herself just je yang THINKS she CANT,"
"its a psycho thing tu," i replied.

i guess it takes a lil time to adjust,

so thank u to all.
thank u to my loved one,
my close ones hu remind me constantly,
from my mom, hu had always reminded me,"YA! NAMPAK RAMBUT!"
to nabilah yg jaoh n ONLY gets to c me once in awhile,"ish, ur tudung,"
to the recently left to sotong kering eka,"here's some cards (on cara cover aurah) fr u,"
to mimi,"pakai je la apa-apa asalkan tutup aurat"


thank u all.

i cant thank enuf.
i also noe its lik a burden to u guys to always remind me, to tuck my tudung,
to tegur me.
but i doa.
i sincerely doa,
u guys get to go to jannah fr tht hair tht slipped out,
fr tht bju yang singkat yang u all always tegur me.
thank u.
jazakillah khairan jaza.


u guys do not noe how mch it means to me.
i m suchan stml (short term memory loss) person at times.
baru post kat instagram,
terus lupa.

im looking forward to my outing with my girlfriends,
maybe a quran picnic yg xjadi during ramadhan (since there were some women problems n busyness with raya =.=" )

i miss usrah.
i miss tazkirah.
i miss ramadhan.

hu m i?
just another servant of Allah.
and tht is all tht is enuf.

forgive me fr my mistakes again.
and jazakillah khairan jaza to all hu surround me. hu "feed" me with ur love, with ur compliments, with ur efforts to c me,to come to my house, to reply my messages, to reply my gestures.
i may not be looking forward to fourth yr (for some residues of third yr calamities) but im building up my strength. pray fr me.

Five For Fighting - What If

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

The Raya circle



of days staying at home, today being the last barulah bukak lappie..

lil miss jalan-jalan suria has been house bound this raya. :))

jangan pula awak fikir saya tak visitting and tunaikan tanggunjawab raya!
kubur wajib!
and semestinye solat raya! :))
(walaupun solat raya saya xsah ;(((( #womenproblems )

but my annual open house has yet to be dijalankan,
insyaAllah this saturday,
but this yr's one is a lil special,
and a lil lesser people.

it has finally after eons dawned on me how important quality is over quantity.

chasing up the wrong tree must be wrong,
but sometimes,
the chasing yg salah, even if its the correct tree,
so now,
that wen i see another dog barking up the wrong tree, i shoo them away and wake them up.
kalau technique salah pun perlu diingati caranya semula.
remind me.
i always forget my techniques sometimes i chase my tail instead of the tree.

but then again,
itu sudah takdir oleh ilahi,
no its not an alasan, cume cara untuk menerima takdir :))
(rukun iman ke 6 mind u)

so today,
im really excited fr my besties doa selamat tomoro (or today? kirekan its past midnite dah)

and i have finally started my research on my elective posting.
with hu else?
mimi ;)

sometimes i wonder how we've come to be. (in the best way :')
a conversation.
just a genuine conversation,
a brief conversation,

one that has nothing of content,
nothing but life,
nothing but sincerity of company.

is one conversation.
a cherished one in silence.

where our eyes meet,
where our souls whisper,
and we know our breathes of life mean something.

i miss our conversation.
sometimes in silence,
sometimes in boisterous laughter.
i miss it dearly.

But this is Allah's way.
So I ask,
i put my arms up high,
for a friend i miss so dear.

If Allah wills, 
let our paths coinside.
Bringing us a new found grace to Him,
For Him
With Him.

For Who is closer than ur jugular vein?
For Who shud u miss more than the one hu gave u life and arranged it so?

As a humble,
small servant,
weak as i am,
I ask from My Lord,
Lord of the heavens and skies.

Allah the Rahman,
Allah the Rahim.

Yakhruju Minhumā Al-Lu'ulu'uu Wa Al-Marjān


Friday, August 2, 2013

maseh bertateh.

hil aliyilazim
(tiada kuasa melainkan kuasa Allah)
(no strength except Allah's)

him: if anything we're doing is a favour
her: well, even the prophet, he was respectful of non Muslims. And she's a Muslim, and criticising her on her first encounter just doesnt seem right.

"i dint 'critisize' her, she degraded Islam wen she chooses not to wear it,"

her:u cant judge a person just because she doesnt wear the head scarf, hu noes, her intentions are truer (ikhlas) than ours?
him: woah, u shud noe we were just joking (about tegur-ing her) and she shud noe tht
her: jokes? sure.

Judged - Muslim Short Film

i think this is a very reflective piece, 
maybe bcause i had a past, and i wasnt totally aware of the hijab and its importance (i knew, but it didnt seem to be as significant as it is to me now).
u noe how lik some wear it bcause wen u become a senior in school, all the seniors wear hijabs.
or wen u enter a certain type of school and ur bounded by these rules.
and as an instagram quote went,
"oh pls, dont wear ur hijab w ur short sleeved tshirt, it just doesnt make sense"
it was kinda funny if u look at it in a way.
but yeah,
we all make mistakes,
we shudnt b proud of them,
and as an aib, shall never talk about it.
but we should learn.
not only for ourselves, but for those around us.
to learn tht everyone goes thru their own battles.
to understand people hence caring them kindly,
because after all,
once a person has sinned, no one can stand between him/her and God when tht person wants to taubat.
hu r we?
to hurt them?

besides, as one of the sahabats once said, "never look down on someones, unless ur helpiing them up"
so pls help me.

these few months,
there had been this continuous battle i had been fighting, deep within myself,
between many many things.
there were holes tht sucked me in.
edges that pushed me off.
and roller coasters to slide me up.
i would say i have not reached the end yet, till my soul leaves my body.
but i'd say, wats the adventure of life without it? and with the qudrat (strength) given by Allah, at this tender young adult age,shudnt we be able to b closer to Allah?
to overcome these force fields and seek Allah's refuge?
for what is the point of calamities and problems if there werent bridges to Allah??
new bridges are built daily,
and some fall.
and some need to be repaired.
but all, with Allah's will.

doesnt Allah afflict challanges to those He wants to give goodness?

all i noe, i have found a new grace

subhanallah Alhamdulillah
but honestly.
im still bertateh-ing.

malay. verb.
english: baby steps.

im still learning.
so many things i may or may not be aware off, but sometimes forget and am still learning to perfect and sometimes fall down.
sometimes slip off.
purely not because i want to.

and i seek refuge in Allah.
and i seek pardon from Him.

sometimes i get hurt and i dono where to lead.
lik the second stop yasmin mogahed mention in her book "reclaim your heart"
the second stop where u either fall down in despair or go up in arrogance.
 but i don seem to like the next pitstop either mentioned in her book, where there will be a dip.
we believe that iman itu bertambah dan berkurang.
it is one of the principles a person of ahli sunnah wal jamaah person wud believe in.
but i don ever wana say goodbye to teardropping moments.
or heart touching conversations.
so here,
i would lik to add tht,

there will be a dip in ur iman.
but dont ever be sad tht u wud never feel the 'awakening' phase of life.
because our live has many many phases, and in each phase, there will ALWAYS be an awakening, at which stage, how much its impact, the magnitude of it may differ, but each one and everyone of the 'awakening' moments will be blissful.
like a wave of jannah's perfumes on ur face and to soul.
so daily
"Allah humma ajirna minan nar"

with the beloved rasulullah's doa,
 Ya Allah, anugerahilah kepada kami dua mata yang menangis kerana takut kepada-Mu, sebelum tidak ditemunya air mata.

or in English, the doa (supplication) for tearful eyes
Oh Allah, gift me a pair of eyes that tear for You out of fear (taqwa) before the day no tears shall fall (death).

insyaAllah it will protect us AWAY from jahannam

dipetik from
so doa!
plead Allah for tht sweetness
kelazatan iman untuk menangis

remember, we may live in the world once, there is only a first for everything.
but well,
Allah can always give a first of the best for everything.
that teardrop u started repenting wen u started ur new life in foundation?
n now ur finishing ur degree u look back and say,
"ohmy,how long tht has gone by? how pious i was then,how i wish i cud be as good n beriman as i was earlier?"
well gues wht?
tht spark u felt reminiscing the past,
thts Allah's call to give u a new awakening.
awakening u from what u r goin thru now.

now ur ending ur degree, now u ca be awaken from ur surroundings,
ur daily routine,
we are human beings with many flaws,
there must definitely be something more than we can do.
lik making sure dhuha every morning.
100 subhanallahs n 100 subhanallah wa bihamdihi
if alhamdulillah,
then fasting continuously every monday and thursday.
if yes too,
then masyaAllah,
maybe tahajjud every night?
with solat tasbeeh every friday at least? :))


even though we are only a nanospec in this huge universe, where we are 500 lightyears from the gates of the first level of the skies,
Allah gives us so many ways to contact him.
for isn it mentioned in the Quran?
Allah is closer to u than the jugular vein?



lets make this ramadhan a meaningful one,
a stain remover to our past sins,
a corrector to the path we took crookedly,
an iron straightener to our character.




q: wud give ur eyes if i gave u a thousand dirham?
a: no.

hence, have u reflected how many countless dirhams of wealth we have?
tht we wud never trade for money?

ps-gambar preview youtube ni chomel! heheh :))

#Short Reminder | The Greatness Of Allah (swt) ᴴᴰ

sins, leave me.

lahawlawala quwatabillah hilaliyilazim!

salams augustus (as the indonesians wud say)
this is a teardropping short film!
heart moving as ever!
but alil scary in the beginning,
but the ending, short sweet n SUBHANALLAH! ful of repentance!
do youtube up "islamic short film"
especially if ur lik me,
the short n sweet kinda person.

Jannati (2011) - 1st Place Muslim Short Film - Islamic Texas MSA Showdown

as my first post this month i wana say,
this months aim is to b thankful.
syukur with wat we have.

syukur with watever small or big blessing we have.
and alhamdulillah!
here we are in the final league of ramadhan,
the night called lailatul qadr.
q: wat did we have to say wen we face difficulty?
ans: say alhamdulillah! thank u Allah for everything.

bcos i wan the pleasure of god, the reason i breath, the reason im here.


this month's puasa,
lets doa it has been accepted, made us practise the tot about people all across the world are starving and some hadnt even the privilage to sahor nor break fast due to their poverty.
i mean, we are so lucky, we r in malaysia, in a country so well known for its food! and we're so lucky to be able to buy them, the privilage to enter the bazaar n noe u have sufficient money in ur pocket to buy u a good worths meal.

have u imagined those hu live in the streets, or the self supporting students in campuses, those urban poor people hu live in high rise low cost flats with a family of six, a small 2 roomed beded house? with a mother hu only is a homemaker and a mediocre working father?
do they have that privilage?
as lowly we see them, supposedly not as educated as us, not as 'rich' as us, not as sociably orientated as us, alil ruder, alil louder than us, but arent we all Muslims? to give charity is always first to those closest to us.

i really wud like to be as productive as i can these 2 months of 'holidays' before i start an even more hectic-er fourth yr.

i will miss ramadhan, to noe August signifies the eidul fitri,
it never made me sadder.
not a bad sad tho.
just sad tht i cud have done better for my ramadhan.
but i noe this has been (so far) the best tht i cud have done.
and my ambition continues,
to carry out wat i had been doin insyaAllah.
wats left of my 2 months :))
as an instagram post i read,
"lets be more than just ramadhan Muslims!"

and after endless tazkirahs about lailatul qadr,
the one most impacted me was the one from yesterday night on telly 1.
forum perdana with the everly funny ustaz ridhuan tee, ustaz badlishah and ustaz zaharuddin from uia.

they mentioned conclusively tht,
lailatul qadr isnt a one night stand
or in thise case, ten night stand.
but a long marathon, prepped from the beginning of time.
lik the runs of olympics.
u practice and practice from much before the real thing so tht as the ustaz said,
the angels are lik "aeroplanes", the need a 'runway' to land on into our houses to carry up our doas.
and wat are these runways made off?
nothing more than zikir, ibadah and charity and the fast the we carry out daily this ramadhan.
not the lamps we lit outside our house.

but not to say jangan pasang lampu lit lap! hehe.. saya suka :)) meriah rasa.
n for the first time in my life.
i really like the songs of raya on the radio, even tho its not raya yet.
its lik little reminders saying,
"hey! do you ramadhan is gona leave u again? all the pahala multiplied! the month of the quran!?!"
lik seriously.
sometimes i even sing along to them.


so this august,
demarcates raya,
and eventhough mom and dad said they tak larat entertain too many guests,
they had still allowed me to call upon my dearest of friends :)

maybe next year insyaAllah.

and this august too 
is the farewell of my other half.
i never knew id ever call her tht.
i never knew.
but i had learnt.

there is maybe.
one n only best.


and my best is goin away.
not because of anything unsubstantial
but it is part of Allah's plan. we are now tht young adults to embark into our own lives.
she a thosand miles away, in a country colder, me, still in the warmth.
and i believe tht if Allah can take something away, Allah can also give too :))

farewell ramadhan.
farewell bestie.